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North Korea Discovers New Mexico!
Last uploaded : Saturday 11th Jan 2003 at 00:49
Contributed by : The Editors


News ?They ate some red bean chilli and we don?t know if that will contribute to a positive atmosphere or not,? reported CNN?s Bob Franken tonight as he emerged from the compound set up at the home of New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson.

Who were ?they??

Well, if I had not seen it unfolding on television I would have thought it a bubbameissa, or an early Purim shpiel. North Koreans -- yes, real live North Koreans ! -- were being hosted by Democrat (that?s right, not Bushite) Bill Richardson , the former Clinton Administration official . What is even more bizarre is that the emissaries? visit had had the blessing of The White House and State Department.

Here is the scenario: the North Koreans just sweep in (they are not subjected to rigorous interrogation by the Immigration and Naturalisation Service as are other ?questionable nationals,? which kinda worries us), and they are given a tour of historic Santa Fe. (This actually happened, according to CNN!) They are then taken for a red bean chilli meal at an authentic red bean chili-making venue. There is no news as yet of whether they actually SURVIVED the chilli excursion. Imagine their gentle stomachs, used to steamed veggies and plain boiled rice, suffering such an onslaught.

What I want to know is this: will they be taken for a guided tour of Los Alamos? Of Roswell? At Los Alamos they can learn all about running a nuclear research plant , and considering that Los Alamos is currently smarting from a string of financial scandals and the resignation of its Director, the North Koreans might even be brought in to clean the place up. Who knows? New Mexico has become something of a Leftie haven. Isn?t the USA the land of opportunity for all nationalities?

What worries me is that the poor souls might end up at Roswell in jam jars.

What irks my liberal colleagues is that President Bush has had Bill Clinton cooling his heels for two years when he could have been spearheading the Middle East peace process . If Bush is willing to have a Democrat performing acts of diplomacy INSIDE the USA, they ask, why could he not have sent Ol?Bill to Jerusalem or Tel Aviv to end this terrible wave of violence? (Maybe he still will -- it is an act many have always felt would be the most magnanimous of any this Republican President could initiate; who on this earth knows more about, and is more respected by all sides in the Middle East conflict than William Jefferson Clinton?) We all know that the Bush White House is a conservative Christian one, but President Bush may have to sweep aside his natural antipathy for Clinton and let his predecessor do his thing in Israel/PA.

Now, back to the No Ko excursion: the whole scenario boggles the mind. Here we are being told that the North Koreans are wacky maniacs hellbent on nuking all of us, but they are given a sun-drenched idyll in the land of the original Conversos.

New Mexico (lest we forget it is the home of Los Alamos) has become a bastion of celebrity anti-war activists including those who came out in force to picket Donald Rumsfeld?s ranch in Taos this past summer. (Such protests would, of course, be forbidden in North Korea.) Britain?s Sky News referred tonight to ?the desperation? of the Bush Administration taking him to the extreme of engaging a staunch Clintonite to negotiate. American comedians are showing a picture of a bewildered George W Bush and joking, 'He wants to know if they did something to his dad...'

However -- in all seriousness -- if at the behest of President Bush, New Mexico's Democrat Governor Bill Richardson can defuse the incendiary situation of the two Koreas, more power to his (very) chubby elbow, but please, Bill R, give them something to eat that won?t generate enough gas to ignite the desert!!


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